It was only a matter of time before the word got out: need help, call the Zombie Help Desk and wait a very long, long time so you can scramble your brains for breakfast while multi-tasking on hold.
Since time immemorial (whatever that means), we have all searched for comfort. The humble couch is the answer, as we all know, or should. So next time you need a break, get the chocolate, the chocolate tuna, and the other tasty TV treats and don’t bench yourself, couch yourself, in glowing terms as well. Enjoy, and you’re welcome.
You know when you just don’t know what you feel like for lunch? Sometimes you feel like a movie star, sometimes you feel like a baker, or even a truck driver. Ignore those feelings and get into bread, bread with anything on it at all. Okay, not yucky things like – well, I won’t say because I don’t want to insult the gourmands among you who may like those yucky things. Go ahead, buy a baguette and go wild.
Despite the headline up there, we all know that the humble yet fabulous cheesecake, could never be a burden, not even on your hips. Well, perhaps on your hips, but be selective, slice it thin like an after dinner mint (think how many thin slices you could have before you reach even an approximation of a full serving, think and feel all fluttery and happy).
Imagine how many millions, perhaps billions, of self-help texts there must be in the world. No, do not do that, you will become extremely depressed and need a self-help text to help you, which it won’t, obviously. I mean, look at the state of the world. So, why not move to Mars and read poetry instead? You know you want to.