Tag Archives: frogs

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Climate Change, it’s a thing. Yes, indeed.

When I was but a wee kitten, my parents and overly competitive sibling and I would travel into the hill country to visit Mama’s sister, Beck From Jupiter, and her husband, Lomas (we never worked out where he was from, lovely head of fur, though).

There I would play in the yard with my overly competitive sibling while the adults got on with their plans to rule the cosmos. He was older than me, OCS was, and could be relied upon to initiate ridiculous games and quizzes, such as, ‘How full is that water tank?’ Anxious to please, and win, I would spend most of the day tap-tap-tapping at the water tank with my tiny, ineffectual little knuckles (yes, of course, cats have knuckles, they’re just well hidden) and asking, ‘Is that it? Is that it?’ of my OCS who, of course, always replied, ‘No, it is not, young Last. Keep tapping,’ as he sashayed around the fenceline in search of, shall we say, playful lizards.

It was a source of persistent curiosity to my mother that, at the end of these idyllic sessions on the hill, I would be completely incapable of holding the tidbits of river trout Mama handed over to my OCS and me in the back seat. My bruised knuckles would refuse to co-operate, and eventually, after much meowing and consideration, she would haul me into the front seat and onto her lap where she’d paw-feed me the teeny morsels.

Needless to say, my OCS in the back seat all alone was rather livid with this outcome, but was I devoid of a master plan just because I was younger, tinier, adorable-er, bruised-er? No, gentle reader, no, I was not.

Carry on.

Climate change featuring frogs, a cow, a water tank.


Last Cat On Mars Presents: Optimists – Do They Really Have A Future?

Yes, I know, but Smiley McSmileface is not related to Moai McMoaiface, except for the face bit, and the Scottish connection. You try coming up with names for every single person who passes your Martian door and see how you go, pal.

All right, tantrum over, let us hope with all our hearts that the future is indeed one where politicians do all those things Smiley The Deluded mentioned – hahahahahahhaha – I find myself typing hahahahahhaha more and more frequently these days – it must stop, and the tuna must flow – preferably downhill and onto my loving and receptive lips (of which I have none, or none that you can detect – the whiskers tend to get in the way). Go in peace now, and search for an honest politician – I dare you…

The optimist dreams of a world where everyone does the right thing

Last Cat On Mars Presents: The Nicest Monsters May Be The Ones You Can’t See

Hey there, fellow Swamp Appreciation Society (SAS) members. It isn’t often that we get to welcome someone like the legendary Nessie to LastCatLand – and we missed her this time, too. Nonetheless, everyone had a lovely time and ate many frog omelettes – just kidding – they all had bayou moonshine and went to hospital.

Bayou with many people in search of the Loch Ness Monster