It’s true that it’s quite difficult to get lost on Mars. After all, Mars is only a bit more than half the size of Earth, there are no oceans to sail, and its mass (whatever that is, hahahahah) is almost 10 times less than Earth’s’s’s’s (and made of tuna – no, really!!). Getting around is a much lighter affair on Mars, too, and we all make merry lollygagging around leaping to and fro, and so on, and etcetera – you know the krill, sorry, drill.
While 9 out of 10 cats prefer to stay out of the way when centaurs are stomping around (innocent tails and all that), the other 14 have no issues with them at all. In fact, felines and centaurs tend to group together to gossip about the latest social media mythological trends over lattes and ceviche at every opportunity. Prove me wrong, go on.
Did you know that the humble bumbling bee is a threatened species? Well, it is. Read this very interesting article from the Climate Institute about the 20,000 or so bee species on Earth and tell me it isn’t important that we care for Mzzzzz Janice Flybeewaxy’s mental health? You can’t, can you? No, you can’t. Climate change, peeps, it’s a thing.
The thing about theft is that, as in a post-truth world, it’s all in the eye, or hand, of the beholder, or the be-stealer. One cat’s burglary is another cat’s night-time stroll around the neighborhood. I mean, just ask Cary Grant in To Catch A Thief. Was there ever a more handsome, urbane, lovely and gorgeous two-legged feline as Mr Grant? The answer is: there wasn’t, and Gracie knew it, too.
In fact, do whatever you can to obtain a copy of the film so that you, too, can share in the joy of watching two thoroughbreds going through their paces. Not to mention Alfred’s involvement in the minor role of director. And while I’m at it, gather in Sabrina (the 1954 Billy Wilder version, the best and only one to watch), too, and make a rainy Saturday afternoon of it with Audrey Hepburn, Humphrey Bogart and William Holden. Now they were real movie stars, grasshopper, and don’t even get me started on Ava Gardner, Virginia Mayo, or Greer Garson. Or Errol Flynn, or Gary Cooper, or Randolph Scott. Just don’t – well, maybe another time, then.
While I’m not given to effusive celebrations here on the red planet at this time of year, I fully appreciate the excitement gathering speed on the third rock.
I well remember Mama and Papa and my sibling, Sibmo, enjoying each other’s company way, way back when we’d dip a delicate paw into the backyard pool before emptying it so we could stretch out and sleep on those cool, cool yule tiles in the midst of tropical summer heatwaves.
And is there anything more sublime than Bill Evans on the old CD player as you barbecue your tuna steaks and sip a delicate and frothy tunanog while swaying along to one of the coolest dudes in the jazziverse? I think there is not, my dearest friends, so I’m off to get in some practice before the big day in my rainbow robes of wondrous, all-inclusive hue.
Meanwhile, let’s all send healing vibes of peaceful energy from wherever we may be to surround and suffuse little mother Earth with kindness and the calming balm of love. I mean it, dudes, let’s start vibing the positive before the place does itself an irreversible injury, okay?! Okay-a-rooney.
Hello, patriots, and other parrots. Here on Mars we don’t see many members of the Psittaciformes order, if you want to be all KIngdom-y and Phylum-y about it. And who doesn’t?
Anyway, it’s imperative that we all act now to save this bird called the Orange-Bellied Parrot, who lives in south-west Tasmania – I know, tropical types like me find it hard to understand the virtues of the cooler states of being.
But it doesn’t stop us from helping these little (not much bigger than a budgie) and very, very cute birds. What better reason could there be for making a donation to the Australian National University’s Pozible crowd-funding appeal – they’re severely endangered, dudes, and severely endangered dudes.
Go to the ANU’s Difficult Birds website to learn a lot more and see some more lovely photos.
Go to the Pozible page to view a video by Professor Robert Heinsohn who will tell you all about the project to save these other little Tassie devils and what else they’ll be able to do if they get even more moolah.
Go there now, to Pozible and check out the wonderful things you can get for being a first-class member of the Chordata Phylum in return for a measly donation – make it thousands, friends, or at least several tens. Good on you.
On such a momentous day (the 2016 US Pestilential, sorry, Presidential election), perhaps we could all benefit from cooling off down south with our Antarctic friends (and a polar bear visiting from the Arctic), however misguided they may be in the matter of parental origins. Enjoy it now, friends, because the times are truly changing.