Category Archives: Variety Show

Last Cat On Mars Presents: What’s In A Name? Archie Petless-Jambok, that’s what.

There’s only one thing to say: Rhino 1, Archie 0.

Rhino about to kill clueless idiot rhino hunter

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Last Cat On Mars Presents: There but for the grace of dog

At any gallery, you will always find a Hooray Henry (like Ralph) with his special tripping shoes on. It is guaranteed, especially around such delicate sculptures as the one we feature today.

Art gallery visitor tripping into a sculpture and making a mess of it

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Was it all for naught, nought, or are we just cross today?

Never been a big fan of noughts and crosses, or other things to do with requiring opposable thumbs and forefingers. Foreclaws, now they’re a different and far more interesting proposition. Also, the posterior variety. Just ask my younger sibling, Scarface, he’ll tell you all you need to know. Just kiddin’. Really.

Two kids playing gigantic noughts and crosses on ladders with huge marker pens

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Perspective and Pcycling Go Hand in Hand

We all find perspective in our own dubious ways, usually involving confirmation and cognitive bias. Who knows, maybe those two things are one and the same – I shall search for research that confirms my cognitions on this conundrum. Meanwhile, bias away, chaps, or bike away, and make it quick. That arch looks temporary to me.

Woman cycling through archway to help her perspective on life

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Occasional Observations – Ants: Small & Annoying, Or Annoying & Small

Yes, ants are both small and annoying, and annoying and small, though somehow rather cute as well when they are not terrifying. Furthermore, they are one of the species that keep everything running on the third rock, and without them, there would be disasters such as we have not seen before. And let me tell you, here on Mars we can do without an influx of terrified terra formers as it were, it is hard enough to grow an edible patch of catnip. So, keep the ants close to your hearts, humans, and others, they are good, though annoying, yes.

PS. I would not recommend Rodney Countemfast for your tax return, although you are a grown-up (maybe you are), so make your own decision, dude.

Ants: small and annoying, or annoying and small with an accountant asked if he counts ants.

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Sculptured Relaxation

I’d like to be able to say that there are relaxing oceans on Mars, but to tell you the truth, I’m just not certain. There is so much more to explore, and melt. But right now, I’m about to find a delightful deck chair, a tuna martini, and a couple of cubist friends with whom to jibber-jabber until the stars emerge. Goodnight.

Sculptures relaxing in deck chairs, or trying to.

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Geometry Sheometry

My old friend, Brigid, simply loves geometry, so she was a sitting duck for the imitation game, wasn’t she? Yes, she was. And what could be lovelier than imitating your own namesake’s symbol? I’ll tell you what could be lovelier – a plate of tuna fancies in the shape of a St Brigid’s Cross, of course. What else? Well, eating them all is what else. Excuse me, I hear some fancies calling.

Brigid imitates the shape of St Brigid's Cross while resting on a sculpture