Monthly Archives: July 2016

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Le Toast de France

Are we there yet? Are we there yet? Wait, yes, it’s over for another year, and Chris Froome has won. Again. For the third time. In a row.

Deja vu all over again, or what, fellow cycle people, or not? I watch it for the recipes, as I’ve mentioned many times, which is just as well, because at least they change from one year to the next. And I’m hoping that there’ll be a lovely and luscious tuna bake from Dusseldorf, home of 2017’s Grand Depart. It is, after all, a city on a river (the Rhine), so there must be tuna around there somewhere.

Meanwhile and P.S., thanks to John Mortimer, creator of our beloved Rumpole and the unforgettable ‘Chateau Thames Embankment.’ Cheers.

Tour de france with lego characters

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Last Cat On Mars Presents: Why Are We Waiting?

Actually, cats of all kinds are very fussy, and it’s unlikely that our friends in this episode are anything but fastidious. Therefore, fret not, humans, the jetty’s bipeds will survive, and thrive, as all four of them wobble off in the SS π or Godot for a lovely day at the beach. Which reminds me, gotta run, the tuna rocket’s just arrived.

(P.S.: Spoiler alert: if you happen to be waiting for Godot to arrive, don’t – he embezzled all sorts of funds (plus a few lamingtons) during the GFC of ’09 (unrelated to the Great Feline Carnival of ’09) and was last seen 40 kilometres west of Wherearewevillle demanding change for a $7 note).

Tigers on jetty waiting for Pi and/or Godot

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Sale of the Century

I’ve always been a big fan of castles and, in particular, the Hollywood castles frequented by that delicious fellow from Tasmania, Mr Errol Flynn. Remember him in The Adventures of Robin Hood? Does it get any better than that? Only if you have tuna-flavoured dainties to nibble as Robin and Maid Marian (the equally lovely Olivia de Havilland who just celebrated her 100th – you read me – 100th birthday – she lives in Paris – Happy Birthday Ms de Havilland, hope the tuna cake was spankingly great) – where was I? – yes, as they ride off to their honeymoon on the Great Barrier Reef where the castles are scarce but the Longtail and Yellow fin tuna are swimmingly abundant.

CastleSaleP1020723CW

Last Cat On Mars Presents: Le Trippe De France – Let the Tour Baguette, Or Something

Hey there fans of Le Tour, which has just this very last few days, hours, minutes, or whenever, begun. I only watch it for the recipes, as you well know, but seeing as how I originally hail from sunny, banana-y Queensland before the Martian residentiality (where I don’t have to vote, hahahahaha) I thought we’d start it off in style, with technology on parade, and in heaps.

And while the opportunity presents, may I offer my sincere (not really – tee hee) condolences to those of you in Ozland who await the outcome of our latest democratic shenanigans – criticise it if you must, but remember Churchill, who said something like: Democracy is the worst possible system of government – except for all the others. Stay faithful, comrades and remember, vote early, vote often.

Riderless bicycles and radioactive bananas